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If There Was A Pill To Cure Procrastination I Would Probably Take It Tomorrow
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If People Could Read My Mind... I'd Get Punched In The Face A Lot
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If Nothing Works Do Nothing
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If No One Comes From The Future To Stop You From Doing It...Then How Bad of a
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If I'm Ever On Life Support Unplug Me Then Plug Me Back In See If That Works
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If I Sit In Rice Will It Fix Me
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If I Knew I Was Going To Live This Long I Would Have Taken Better Care Of Myself
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If I Can't Bring My Dog I'm Not Going
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If I Agree With You We'll Both Be Wrong
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If History Repeats Itself I Am So Getting A Dinosaur
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If Dogs Could Talk I'd Have No Reason For People
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I've Done Terrible Things For Money Like Waking Up Early To Go To Work
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I'm Wearing Black Today To Mourn The Death Of My Motivation
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I'm Trying To Give Up Sexual Innuendos, But It's Hard...So Hard
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I'm The Quiet Neighbor With The Big Freezer
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I'm Sorry I Don't Take Orders. I Barely Take Suggestions
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I'm So Broke I Can't Even Pay Attention
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I'm Silently Correcting Your Grammar
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I'm Running For A Cause I Have to Poop
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I'm Old but I'm Like Cool Old
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I'm Not Weird I'm Limited Edition
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I'm Not The Type Of Person You Should Put On Speaker Phone
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I'm Not Sleeping I'm Just Resting My Eyes
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I'm Not Sick I'm Twisted Sick Makes It Sound Like There's A Cure
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I'm Not Rude. I Just Say What Every One Else Is Thinking
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I'm Not Insulting You I'm Describing You
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I'm Not Immature It's Just That You Started It
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I'm Not Getting Older I'm Just Becoming a Classic
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I'm Not Gay But $20 is $20
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I'm not Anti-Social I'm Anti-Stupid
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I'm Not A Proctologist But I Do Know An Asshole When I see One
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I'm Not A Gynocologist But I'll Take A Look.
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I'm Nicer Than My Face Looks
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I'm Mom's Favorite
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I'm Mean Because You're Stupid
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I'm Looking Forward To Regretting This
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